The situation described in this image is becoming increasingly common, especially among men who practiced monogamous family life. I can relate to this through the experience of my uncle, who has been living alone since 2016 after his wife left for Germany. Her initial reason was to assist their daughter, who had just given birth. However, the situation has dragged on, as the daughter has since had two more children, yet my uncle’s wife has not seen the need to return to her husband.
About two years ago, my uncle asked me to talk to his wife about returning home. During our conversation, I was shocked by her response. She bluntly said, “Your uncle should go and carry the women he used to carry when he was younger.” It became clear that her decision to stay away was intentional. She knows her husband is now old, weak, and unable to pursue other women or manage much on his own, as he relies solely on his pension and the small support sent by their children.
When I pressed further, she revealed her perspective: she claimed my uncle used to threaten her with the idea of taking a second wife and had maltreated her during their younger years. I couldn’t help but ask if this was some form of revenge. Her words left me wondering if some women patiently wait until old age to settle scores, knowing that their husbands are now vulnerable.
This story reflects a broader reality: old age often seems to favor women more than men. Many men, who once held control in their prime, find themselves at the mercy of their wives and children when they grow older. This dynamic is worsened when men fail to secure a solid foundation for their later years.
My advice to men is this: Plan for your old age. Build a support system independent of anyone, whether it’s financial stability, meaningful relationships, or a reliable community. Avoid relying solely on your wife or children, as situations can change. A secure and well-thought-out plan for your later years can ensure that no one—neither a spouse nor your children—will take you for granted when you are most vulnerable.
Rita Ebiuwairo
